Alice Cooper impersonator Marilyn Manson has gotten himself engaged to burlesque performer Dita von Teese. It’s said that Manson proposed the old-fashioned way by getting down on one knee and asking her. There was no mock crucifiction, no bondage, nor even a pair of goth chicks making out.
I, for one, am glad to see that Marilyn (né Herbert Cecil Lowenstein) and Dita (her actual name) have finally embraced the ancient concept of the heterosexual nuclear family and have turned their backs on the cesspool of Soddom and Gomorrah they call “alternative lifestyles.”
The couple have also announced they intend to purchase a nice bungalow that’s fancy but not, in their words, “fancy-schmancy.” They also plan on having two children, a boy and girl named Hayden and Fiona Manson-von Teese, respectively.
An official annoucement will be shortly published in the Weddings section of the New York Times.