“hello. i’m johnny cash.”

Looks like Johnny Cash won’t make it to the MTV VMAs after all. This is kind of bad news as he would have been the only performer who performs songs, unlike the current rotation of popular artists (damn kids and their music, grumble grumble). Well, the dude is like, 71 and not doing well, health-wise. But still, his video for his cover of Nine Inch Nails’s “Hurt” was one of the best of the year (right alongside Sigur Ros) and it would have been nice to see him.

In other Johnny Cash news:

-Joaquin Phoenix is set to play him in a biopic next year with Reese Witherspoon as June Carter Cash. Don’t know how I feel about that. Phoenix is cool and was a great villian in “Gladiator” (“He vexes me. I’m feewing tewwibwy vexed.”) but is he Johnny Cash Cool? We shall see. Witherspoon, I’m even less sure about.

-A big box set of outtakes from his Rick Rubin produced “American Recordings” is on the way. It includes a duet with Joe Strummer on Bob Marley’s “Redemption Song.” Strummer once wrote a song for Cash to record but he sent it back, claiming, “It confused me, son.” Or so I’ve heard. Cash outlived Strummer. How punk is that?

Meanwhile, if there’s no Cash tonight, there is always Britney Spears and Madonna, dressed as bride and groom, singing “Like a Virgin” atop a giant wedding cake. Or so I’ve heard.

Damn kids and their music…

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