“Globe and Mail columnist and Canada’s inimitable ‘It’ Girl [sic] Leah McLaren’s The Continuity Girl, about the romantic adventures and misadventures of a film-industry insider, combining social satire with a fresh perspective on the overworked, underburdened experience of the young and unapologetically neurotic modern female, to Iris Tupholme at HarperCanada, with Siobhan Blessing editing, by Anne McDermid.”
Tell me, dear readers, what does an aneurysm feel like?
Speaking of young female newspaper columnists, The Montreal Gazette is getting one. Her name’s Max Mendolson. Yesterday they ran an ad, announcing her arrival in next week’s paper. The ad tells us that she is young and hip and will tell us fogies what “phat” means.
I love reading columnists. They’re the best part of the paper. That why I love weblogs. I love self-expression. But the Globe’s cabal can be an awfully precious lot. Their stable of writers don’t give us much in the way of a unique perspective on current events or trends. What do give us, more often than not, is a piercing insight into their upper middle-class lives. And so we get to learn things such their new SUVs, their “cottage” in the Muskokas, or their trip aboard a yacht in Italy. Stuff most Canadians can so readily identify with.
I have no idea who Max is or what her writing is like but I’m sure her contribution to the Gazoo will be a welcome one. They need some young whippersnappers in there. It’s just that The Globe and Mail has two young, hip, rich, urban columnists (Russell Fucking Smith being McLaren’s metrosexual counterpart) and between the two of them, they’ve been enough to make crumple my paper into a huge, awkward ball that I would petulantly throw toward the wall screaming “Oh just fuck off!!!” I finally decided to stop torturing myself and took up with the Gazoo and pretended not to notice the canada.com ads.
There’s already one major urban newspaper overrun by precious gits. We don’t need two. So Max, if you’re out there, good luck with the new gig and just remember this word of advice: you write the news. You are not the news.