The Muppets As Reviewed By Someone Who Took A 3.25 Year Old To The Theatre

It was in 1979 at the age of 8 that I first saw The Muppet Movie after having enjoyed their work on The Muppet Show and Sesame Street. The movie was a lot of fun because it presented the Muppets in their origin story, had that little in-joke where they meet Big Bird who informs them he’s off to make his fortune in public television, and most of all, you saw Kermit riding a bike on his own, which freaked. my. shit. OUT.

They would later freak my shit out when C-3P0 tap danced on The Muppet Show.

(skip to the end)

The Muppet Show was filmed in England, as was The Empire Strikes Back so you ended up seeing Luke in his Empire outfit four months before the movie was released. I thought they designed it specifically for his appearance with the Muppets and they kept it for Empire.

Anyway, skip ahead 31 years and today we took our 3.25 year old to The Muppets. A recent convert, James is particularly fond of Animal and asks us to do the Swedish Chef.

Last summer we took him to Winnie the Pooh which he managed pretty well. I was worried about his attention span as The Muppets is longer than Winnie the Pooh and is somewhat more complex in its narrative structure.

The 70% of it we saw was pretty good. As co-writer, Jason Segal displayed a reverence for the source material and a flair for comedy but as an actor, I’ve never been able to support the guy. I’m not sure why. He looks like he doesn’t wash with soap. On the other hand, Amy Adams was a delight, as always. If you don’t like Amy Adams, stop reading this and go somewhere else. You’re not a nice person. I don’t want to know you.

James dug it for the most part but his reactions were limited to announcing the characters as they appeared on screen.

“THAT’S KERMIT!”

“THAT’S MISS PIGGY! SHE SAYS HIIII-YA!”

“THAT’S FOZZIE!”

“ANIMAL!”

“WHAT’S HIS NAME?”

“I’M DONE!”

The he wanted to play. Then he wanted to pee. Then he wanted to play again. Then he wanted to go down to the arcade and sit in every driver’s seat of the car games. Eventually we gave up and left, just in time for the number, “Am I A Man Or A Muppet?” so I’m not sure if they managed to save the old theatre or not. I’ll have to wait for the DVD, I guess.

Next time, after $50 in tickets and concessions, I think we’ll just wait to see a movie when it comes to Dollar Cinema.

Did I Mention That I Turned 40 Recently?

Actually, I did mention it in passing. So four months ago, I turned 40 which was marked by a brief trip to Toronto to experience Heatmageddon and the Toronto Zoo. I didn’t go out for a big bash, which is just as well as I fall asleep after two beers these days.

It’s supposed to be a big turning point, hitting that mid-life spot. But I ended up arranging our vacation around it so that I wouldn’t be bothered about feeling I needed to do something for my birthday. The only thing I did do for my birthday was take up running so I could do the Terry Fox Run. I haven’t run since then but I’m hoping to get back into it. Not because I enjoy it. Sometimes I do but mostly I still thinking running is awful. But it gets me the results I want.

So it wasn’t any great shock when I woke up at 40. I think I turned that corner a while ago and all things considered, I prefer middle-age any earlier age I’ve experienced. I like being at the top of my earning power (which ain’t much but still…) more than being broke all the time. I like being comfortable with my tastes in entertainment without worrying if someone writing for The Guardian might disapprove. I like being comfortable in my skin instead of being insecure and self-absorbed.

Some things have changed. I became a member of a certain political party. I flirted with hitching my wagon to the Unitarians. And Kerry and I agree that our new local United Church seems like a nice place and we’d probably attend if, as she puts it, "it weren’t for all the God stuff." And now we spend our Sundays at the local library. And we’re planning a small wedding next July to finally finish that task we meant to complete in 2008.

So to sum up: 40 > 20.