Shatnerian

Assorted nerdery and general parental fails from Montreal's West Island.


4 Comments

Arrivederci Tee-Hee Della Squadra

This week, the Amazing Racers hit Sicily in a grueling and physical leg that almost broke my faves Dave and Lori of Team Nerd. Last week, I noticed the race was beginning to take its toll on the pair.

This week, it was another one of those needle in a haystack tasks, as the teams had to choose between carrying a heavy bell to a church or searching through hundreds of items of laundry to find a coloured tag. Team Nerd chose the latter and Dave became visibly frustrated as he failed to find the tag (which Lori eventually found). I don’t think he read the clue all the way through and therefore didn’t seem to know what he looking for.

Later, it was Lori’s turn to become frustrated as they had to assemble a replica of an ancient Greek statue that, unknown to the racers, had two surplus pieces. Lori assumed all the pieces had to be used and broke down crying when they wouldn’t all fit. Finally she finished and they arrived in sixth place, where Dave became emotional over the way he became around Lori (which wasn’t bad at all, they were both being cranky but in no way were they evil to each other). Aww. Ray and Yolanda came in seventh place after getting lost and losing a lot of time.

Eliminated were Team Tee-Hee who never recovered from their last place finish in Munich. That leaves Team Jock’s Eric and Jeremy, who really like girls, with nobody to chase after. As they performed the statue task, they admired how cut ancient Greek men were. They came in second and pouted about their mistakes. I think coming in second is pretty good and so did Phil.

“Gee guys,” he asked. “You think you could be a little bit excited?”

In first place were BJ and Tyler, who were dialing back the wackiness a little bit this week but they’re still fun to watch. Also, their “Bowling Moms” T-shirts were awesome. At this point, the race is very much between Team Damn Dirty Hippies and Team Jock, with Team Ross Perot’s Lake and Michelle not far behind.

Lake, you called Dave “fat boy.” You’re dead to me. Good thing Lake’s idiocy will eventually force his team to implode, especially if an upcoming task is internet-based. Lake doesn’t “do the internet.” Good thing, too. I’d hate to see him read the things people are saying about him.

Wait a minute. Yes, yes I would.


5 Comments

Monday Spawned a Boycott

Canadian Morrissey fans will be disappointed to learn they won’t be seeing him play their hometowns any time soon. Moz has decided to boycott Canada on account of the seal cull.

Moz’s position on meat has long been a matter of record since the 1980′s: “It’s death for no reason,” he said. “And death for no reason, is murder.” He also compared the seal hunt to German gas chambers. Tasteful.

Canadian Morrissey fans have announced their plans to stage a massive Parliament Hill “mope-in” as part of an effort to persuade Prime Minister Stephen Harper to put a stop to the seal hunt.

Bardot hates us. So do Paul and Heather McCartney. And now, even good, still sort of relevant, artists have put us on notice. Do you see what you’ve done, Newfoundland and Labrador? Do you see what you’ve done?!?

Morrissey’s tour will continue in the United States, where no animals are ever killed or abused for any reason whatsoever.


6 Comments

The Sopranos, Episode 6.03: “Mayham” (minor spoilers)

No, that’s not a typo in the title.

Sometimes I feel like Silvio Dante in last night’s episode, what with the panic attacks and the inability to deal with the position of responsibility he’s suddenly given.

Totally unrelated but Paulie totally deserved that kick in the junk:

“I gotta wear a jock, the doc said. Keep the testes elevated.”

Follow

Get every new post delivered to your Inbox.

Join 54 other followers